amwriting, Pagham-verse

#AmWriting Update: Eldritch Girls Just Want To Have Fun

Sasha and Tosh by @/warickaart – Therese

You may remember that I’m co-writing a splatterpunk horrormance, and the eagle-eyed among you will have noticed that THIRTEENTH has the following in its frontmatter:

Chapter 3 cameo appearances in the snuff film scene are
related to the spin-off ELDRITCH GIRLS JUST
WANT TO HAVE FUN, co-written with Nita Pan.
Tosh Haraldson is the original character of Nita Pan.
@NitaPanWrites on Twitter and Instagram

Note that Nita Pan has rebranded to Ezra Arndt, for several reasons, but has been published under Nita Pan in the anthology FROM ASHES TO MAGIC, where their story, a prose poem, is entitled ‘Life and Death’.

They have edited and published a story, ‘The Field Devours’ in THE UNCANNY AND THE DEAD anthology under the name Ezra Arndt, and funded a successful Kickstarter project, MY SAY IN THE MATTER, a charity anthology for Abortion Funds.

I have an interview on my podcast with them here.

Here’s an extract from my novel THIRTEENTH mentioning Sasha and Tosh; in this extract, Wes has placed a bet on when Sasha’s victim would expire, and thanks to some hallucinogens that unlock his ability to see the future, he wins. He hasn’t quite worked out that this is what the drugs do, but this scene is instrumental in him finding this out. He’s already high, and has been drinking champagne, so this POV section is from that fractured viewpoint.

At fifteen minutes and exactly twenty-eight seconds, the heart monitor beeped in warning and the man’s vitals no longer registered.

Wes crowed, did a complimentary line off the table, started on the water, and ordered a coffee.

His sisters fawned over him, the sulky Yank with eyeliner stumbled up to flirt but stopped when he realised Wes was Sasha’s cousin, another bottle of champagne popped near his ear, and Wes exulted in sheer relief and adrenaline.

Sasha, resplendent in a fishnet body stocking and blood-spattered platform shoes, performed a flirty burlesque dance with the tools of her trade while the next victim was wheeled in, conscious and screaming.

Fucking hell, Sash. We used to dress up and play in Wonderland together, remember? Those were the days.

Wes concentrated on sobering up, watching the clock. There was no way he’d be right a second time.

The girl was declared dead twenty-two minutes and fifty-three seconds in. Bang on.


Wes asked for chamomile tea. He tapped his foot against the table leg until Lucy kicked him, patience expired.

The third victim was wheeled in, the last one for this set.

After some erotic shenanigans with a pair of bolt cutters, the reappearance of the dental drill and a final
flourish – a jigsaw – the unwilling ‘volunteer’ was sawn in half. Blood spatter coated the two-way mirror, obscuring the view.

You can grab THIRTEENTH on its own in eBook or Paperback, or as a duet eBook with THE CROWS, but the flavour of Sasha’s scene gives you an idea for the tone of the book and Wes’s POV sections.

THIRTEENTH is set c.2019, while Sasha’s spinoff story, ELDRITCH GIRLS JUST WANT TO HAVE FUN, is set c.2016, so some three years earlier.

Eldritch Girls is in rewrite stages, currently 80K and almost complete.

I have blogged about the co-writing process here. The temporary cover is below, just to give you a rough idea of the vibe!

Premise: An eldritch snuff film star who believes murder is performance art falls for a sado-masochistic devolving hitman working for her gangster uncle, despite their relationship being out-of-bounds.

Setting: Brighton, England (with flashbacks/refs to Chicago, IL, USA)

Structure: Dual POV, his/hers, following/subverting a romance novel format. The male POV is in US English, the female POV is in British English.

MCs: Bisexual allo(?) guy (USA), greyromantic allosexual/hypersexual het-ish girl (UK). Both are villains.

Side Characters: Gay [British] guy running the tech side of the snuff film business in “love” triangle with MCs (love is a loose term here); eldritch gangster and his family of abominations; snuff film producer; runaway sister of male MC; rescue cat belonging to female MC.

Background Characters: Eldritch family members; detective ex-boyfriend of male MC [Chicago-based]; ex-boss of male MC in Chicago; various people the female MC sleeps with/kills; wife of runaway sister and best friend of runaway sister.

Warnings/Content Notes: Extreme horror scenes including a lot of gore, graphic violence inc castration, strong/graphic language (obviously), stalking, abuse of privacy, toxic familial and romantic relationships, incestuous sibling, homicidal rescue cat (who doesn’t die and is not hurt at all), devolving character arcs (“I can make him worse <3”), coerced acid trip in a church leading to blasphemous use of the Eucharist, religious trauma, homophobic family & related trauma in a US context, kinky sex and masturbation scenes inc knife play and erotic asphyxiation, dub con, no redemption arcs, alcohol and drug use/abuse, and lots of body horror.

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